The Joys of Motherhood

***Let me just say you that if you get sick easily, you may not want to read this! ;)  You’ve been warned!

This story was too funny not to share :)  This morning, I wake up to the sounds of Naomi talking to herself in bed. Such sweet, innocent sounds.  I crawl out of bed and go into her room to find she has peed through another diaper and all over herself sometime in the night or this morning.  This is so extremely frustrating to me because this happens a lot.  I stopped giving her bottles right before bed and I’ve even tried the Pampers Night Time diapers that are supposed to prevent this. It STILL happens. UGH. So, I pick her up, take her to the bathroom, strip her down and throw her in the bath with her morning bottle…

(Excuse my IPhone pictures)

So cute and innocent. Momma has no idea what’s next.  As she’s sitting there, she starts grunting like she does when she goes #2.  I say, “Don’t go poo poo in your bath, Naomi”.  Still grunting. “Don’t go poo poo,” I say again. Still grunts. And then I have the idea that if she is really trying to go (and it would be the first time for her to do this while she’s bathing) that I could just pick her up and set her on the toilet. Brilliant! I go over to pick her up and, as I do, I see this…

Yep, too late! (Don’t you just LOVE that I gave you a visual of this! Ha! Me too!)  I’m completely grossed out right now, but I still decide to sit her on the toilet just in case she’s not done.  She sits there for a little bit, still grunting some, but nothing more comes from it. I think she is done so I stand her next to me and the bathtub so I can clean it out real quick. As I’m draining the tub, I look down next to me and see this…

You have GOT to be kidding me?!  I thought we had a human baby, not a dog…what the crap?! (pun intended).  At this point, yes, I’m a little frustrated that it seems like I can’t get one thing started or finished without another mess happening, but at the same time I’m laughing about how hilarious all this is!  So, I pick up naked Naomi and set her in the bathroom sink because, at this point, I’m thinking ahead, people!  Since she’s still naked and already pooped, she might still pee, and if she does, I do not want to clean THAT mess up!  So into the sink she goes so I can clean up her other two messes.  The poop on the floor was easy.  However, why I thought the poop in the tub would rinse down the drain easily is beyond me.  It didn’t.  So, now I have to use the long drain hair cleaner thingy-ma-jig and pull out hair with bits of poop stuck in it. By hand, people. SO. GROSS.  After that disgusting-ness, I finally am able to spray the tub with bleach, rinse it down, and run another bath for Naomi.  All before 8am.  Just another day in motherhood!



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